It could be very helpful to express your condolences, both for Debbie Joffe-Ellis, and for Al's many close friends and relatives, who will sadly miss him. It could also be helpful for you to get your thoughts and feelings out "on paper" so you can process this sad, momentous event. To leave your thoughts, just click on the word "comments" below.
Best wishes,
Jim
Jim Byrne
ABC Coaching and Counselling Services.
Face-to-face coaching, counselling and therapy.
Online and telephone coaching, counselling and therapy.
Email coaching and counselling service.
The Institute for CENT Studies).
Couples Therapy Service: (Relationship skills; marriage counselling).
Training in REBT/CBT for counsellors/therapists.
The REBT Network, for information about the late Dr Albert Ellis and REBT.
~~~
11 comments:
I would like to express my deepest sympathy to Debbie and all the gang of Al's friends. I have learned of Al's passing away from here in France where I have been trying to honor his teachings, I am therefore happy to be adequately sad that he has left. I have also an adequate feeling of anger that he had to go through such an ordeal at this stage of his life after such a fantastic contribution to the field of therapy. As far as I'm concerned there is no rational excuse for it. I'll miss Al but he will always be with me wether he likes it or not. Now to carry on his endeavor...
Hi,
Nata and I went to bed late, after posting the notification of Al's passing. We awoke later than normal, and I was surprised to find that I felt peaceful. 'Could it be this easy?' I asked myself. All I felt was relief for Al that he is not suffering any longer. After a while I swung my legs out of bed, and sat on the side of the bed, and then I registered just how different a world with Al in it, and a world in which there is no Al, felt to me. It was like a blow to my guts. The tears poured out. I sobbed them out. And then then they passed. Then I remembered all the difficulties through which Al was put in his final two years of life, and I sobbed some more, for his pain and discomfort. Then I remembered Debbie, whose sadness will be so much greater than mine. Al knew how much me meant to her, and promised to live to be 150 so he could be with her to the end of her life. But like so many of his other plans, this was not to be. My heartfelt condolences go out to Debbie. I have a small sense of the pain of loss you must be feeling. I feel so much sadness that things were not the way we would have liked them to be. To minimize the sadness, I remind myself: 'Life is tough and then you die'.
Words are so inadequate on an occasion like this. Debbie: please know that you are loved and respected, for yourself, and also for the great joy you brought into Al's life. Love is the most important thing in the world, and you and he had lots and lots of it for your few years together. I wish you well in your mourning; and relief from your sense of loss.
Love,
Jim
I want to thank Debbie from the bottom of my heart for the way she loved and devoted herself to Al's welfare during his final years and months. Al is now free of pain, and I hope that Debbie can recover from her intensive nurturing, knowing that she made a massive contribution to his quality of life.
What Al represented is utterly precious - complete egalitarianism, deep yet unsentimental compassion for others, straight, unpretentious communication, and he created the most stunningly simple yet profound techniques for helping people free themselves from the internalised toxic garbage they have inherited from their cultures and families.
The previous post was by Nata, but it appears with my name (Jim) because Nata does not have a Google account. So let's try to sort that out and re-submit it.
THIS IS A MESSAGE FROM NATA:
I want to thank Debbie from the bottom of my heart for the way she loved and devoted herself to Al's welfare during his final years and months. Al is now free of pain, and I hope that Debbie can recover from her intensive nurturing, knowing that she made a massive contribution to his quality of life.
What Al represented is utterly precious - complete egalitarianism, deep yet unsentimental compassion for others, straight, unpretentious communication, and he created the most stunningly simple yet profound techniques for helping people free themselves from the internalised toxic garbage they have inherited from their cultures and families.
I want to thank everyone who cared and supported him, and to them and his family and friends I want to offer my sincerest condolences. I intend to honour you, Al, by carrying on your magnificent work.
Hi,
The following comments were sent to me by email, concerning the passing of Albert Ellis:
Person 1:
"I am sad, too, Jim. He was a wonderful, decent, and quite rare man. I will miss him greatly.
(Name withheld)
~~~
Person 2:
"...
"But, millions will miss Albert, and no one will miss them. Years from now, when the Institute has faded away and disappeared, Albert's writings will remain, and like many great thinkers, he will be remembered.
"...
(Name withheld)
~~~
Person 3:
"...
"Thank you for keeping everyone informed. I was saddened to hear this news and can only hope that:-
"1. Albert is now in a place where there are no greedy people...
"2. ...
"3. ...
(Name withheld)
~~~
Audrey Jung sent in the following message:
"My condolences, Jim. Meeting Al changed my life, as I am sure he did countless others.
"May he now rest in peace.
"Fondly,
"Audrey Jung"
~~~
I was fortunate in that I had many opportunities to meet and work with Al, from training seminars to the City College of New York. His teachings and advice and timeless phrases have stuck with me and served me well for over 35 years. I can still hear his destinctive voice ringing in my ears. My favorite is "nobody promised you a f--king rose garden....". I revere the teachings and the man. The world was better off with him in it. My condolences to his family and friends.
I was so saddened to read of Dr Ellis's passing today. He was someone who gave so much to so many and will be sadly missed. I'm still getting used to the idea and don't think it has quite sunk in yet. Dr Ellis was such a strong character that it almost seemed like he could cheat illness and death indefinitely!
While I am sad, and feel a sense of loss, I also feel overwhelming gratitude. I am so grateful that I was touched by his teachings, which helped me improve my life immeasurably. I'm so grateful that he worked so hard to spread his word and that the world was lucky enough to have him. I'm grateful to Debbie and his supporters, especially Jim and Renata for their commitment and devotion to him when he needed it.
Our lives will not be the same without him but I'm certain that he will live on in his teachings and in his followers, including anyone for whom REBT has been a positive influence. Such a wonderful character could never be forgotten.
My deepest sympathies to his wife Debbie, his friends and family, and to Jim and Renata whose tireless support through his difficult times was inspiring.
Hi,
A long-term supporter of Al's from NYC sent in a somewhat similar message to Gráinne's - in the sense of covering similar territory. However, because she did not give explicit permission in her email to post it here, I am not going to reveal her identity, nor include her comments on how the campaign was run, and who deserves commendation, etc. I will, nevertheless, quote some of her comments about Al, as follows: "I am very sad about Al's passing. I realize in his physical condition it was best for him to get back into the universe. He helped and inspired me immensely. Although I use his philosophy every day and he is alive and well inside my mind, I'd rather see his smiling face and hear his cursing and brilliant mind live and in person".
"My deepest sympathy".
This message, like all those above, will be sent to Al's widow, Debbie, in a few days time.
Thanks for posting.
Best wishes,
Jim
I would like to express my deepest sympathy to his devoted wife Debby and everyone who felt connected to Big Al.
As my father was inspired by Dr. Ellis during his RET education in 1978, he inspired me, which let to the opportunity to meet Al in 2005 during the REBT practitioners course in NY. I am glad that I got the chance to experience an extraordinary personality and learn a lot from him (in person and through his many books). His words and contribution to psychology and society as a whole will live on forever all over the world!
Post a Comment